Day without him...

Start from 6/8/2010 i think im alone, He not besides me anymore...
No hug, No kiss, No love, No care, No quarrel, No money & No mentally support..
Can i face this alone?? Some might say cannot, some might think is possible,,but take time..

But for me i think need a longer time..We been couple long time ad..on Off on Off almost 6 years d..Such a long time...>> but what i feel is when he want he just do..never really think about me..if i question him, He will say " have u do the same thing to me also??" At that moment im speechless,, He always wanted a fair relationship...but is it possible?
Most people see how He treat me nice...But i think no 1 will see me treat him nice..Perhaps I don't treat him NicE??

I just don't want to give him that time, i never thk like don't want to give him..But...When the moment He say" arr, do ur self lahh" this 1 really hurt...what the thing happen is im diugut from a perpon i love & who say that love me...that moment He really challenge my dignity..even u give me a Diamond i also need to think Think twice..
Count 1-5 to gv me 1 more chance?? ...5 years plus equal to counted 5.... OMG...

" U over the limit! I never expect ur attitude is this bad. Dont blame me what i going to do next. U seriously change my impression on u! Good bye"

Before i reply Him..i think "is ok Chanel...just a assignment, u can do it,, after u finish this, it mean not exactly must depends on him...Hmm...you can do it"

"Sorry to make u feel tht way. Anyway ths is me, i dun like diugut frm u. Im nt going to explain much,, pls noted tht u also change my impression on u. Mayb wat u say is correct, often say it, it will bcm a prayers..but u trust or nt, is up to u, im nvr pray for tht.. Nice word i duno how to say,, but thx for evythg tht u gave me,, much much appreciate it tht u wont reliase.. i thk we wont hv our anniversary anymore..Even once.. Good bye & take care."

I study..I doing my work...Im also wait his call...But it nvr happen...Im sad Im tears drop..no 1 realize..I dun others know...I want be strong n stronger...
YES...im done my assgnmt w/o him...but when tht moment im done, i hope he with me at that moment..i want get praise from him...but so sorry, it wont happen..

I cant imagine what he doing now,,may be having class,,eating,, go jalan tunku abdul rahman...(i check on him) watever up to him lahh...

Before sleep thinking of him,,,after wake up thinking of him...duno how long this situation will continued, but i trust 1day it will be fine..

3 day nvr contact me at all...I miss him...please give me strength..


xoxoxoxo,
€haNellE